KANGJIE

Thursday, September 25, 2008

day4 .

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?

today was morning shift. was fucking tired when i reach and was pissed when desmond was late. im not pissed when someone is late. im pissed when that someone ask me to be early and he himself late. one kind of manager huh?

its actually been a week since i've worked morning shift. the last time i worked morning shift is after i went for a morning swim. i actually had to ps him and drag myself to work. that day was............... shag.

work was fine today. especially the part when i didnt even have the time to catch my own breath. not alot of people. i suppose its lack of manpower? and keeping myself busy is also what i want. i wont complain about how busy i am in timberland. i hope for this. and i want it!

and its really amazing how a stranger, a customer, being so nice and polite to you and all of a sudden your day brighten up! it happen to me today. and its because of work, i can let my mind relax from thinking that much for 8/9 hours.

its my off day tomorrow. desmond asked me to work. i wanted to agree at first. but we might be having dinner tomorrow night. but if there isnt one, i will be rotting at home and bring back my pathetic life. pray that i wont drown in my own tears.

i keep on refreshing my tagboard hoping to get some replies. its quite disappointing though. but who can i blame? who will come to my blog and receive negative energy from me?

there's actually a period of time where i think my life is great. that should be somewhere at the mid august. but i guess good things doesnt last long. oh great. so much for talking about how my life is good and then a suddenly drop of boulder down my heart. sinking. do you ever had those kind of feelings? your heart is feeling sour-ish. oh damn. thats a kind of feeling i dont know how to describe.

i guess thats it for today's story? yup. goodnights to all. and study hard for those who is taking o levels in less than 2months.

kangjie.
177th episode.

P.S I LOVE YOU

11:25 PM

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

life .

today was okay. woke up around 11plus and meet rachel for lunch around 1plus and pass her twister. went to some hawker and ate some-not-very-special prawn noodles.

went back home and get myself ready for work. desmond called this morning and asked me to work. i know this is going to happen and cause fizah warn me already. LOL! i agreed. this i guess is considered as the first time i agree to work last mine after i resume work. i just want to keep myself busy and refrain myself for thinking alot. my sister came back from macau today. she bought me kinder surprise. she keep saying that singapore doesnt sell that anymore. is that true? i shall go check it out someday.

journey to work is tough. i think i have to change my way of going to work. traveling in a bus makes me think alot. i dont know why. maybe i should take mrt instead.

i love taking stock from other outlets. can use this time to eat snake and see how singaporeans move in that super fast pace. i might be one of them 10/20 years down the road.

these 2 days seems very long. it even seems like 2 weeks to me. sigh.

work again tmr. it's morning shift. im glad i can go home around evening time. so i dont have to spend money on my dinner. i seriously need to save money now. there are occasion coming up like real soon. and i cannot depend on my stupid pay which comes in only when my school starts!

sad to say, i indeed have a pathetic life.

kangjie.
177th episode.

P.S I LOVE YOU

~~(and shit blogger, how do i enlarge my font?!)~~

//edit 25/09/2008 2AM
i just finished watching The Lake House starring Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock. its a really beautiful love story, its really beautiful.

how on earth did i missed such a good and touching movie.

11:59 PM

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

work .

这感觉已经不对
我努力在挽回

work was fine, minus the part that i've been asked to sit at the guard's office at takashimaya. i guess this is the shitty thing for work today. there's something bound to happen everytime i work. why? im not sure too.

anyway, work really let me put away my personal emotions aside for the time being. just for that few hours. when there are nothing for me to do, here it goes again. it reminds me of how miserable i should be now. oh well, just keep myself busy and i guess everything will be fine.

suet drop by to see me today. how sweet of her. bought me a lollipop hoping that it can brighten up my day. i guess she did? its been very long since i last seen her. weixiong kimwee and bingchao came too.

wanted to find rachel after my work but she told me she's not working. so plan change. went up to coffee club to find julina instead. had a little chat with her. we should be meeting up again soon bah. be it just for a few hours of dinner.

took a bus back. and yes. my pathetic life came back right to me. think alot alot alot alot alot alot of things. and i also know that i already fucked up my life. and if ever this is gonna settle down, i know it wouldnt be the same anymore. i just know it. and yes. thats how fucked up my life is right now!

i always know that i should expect things to go the way i want. but now it is now fucking going the opposite way i want. i didnt expect much. i guess i just want a simple life with my buddies surround me? its not too much isnt it? life is just so unfair to me. in fact, i think life is unfair to everyone. just that its harder on me.

oh well. always think of the bright side of life. if thats what i taught you, i should be the role model isnt it? goodbye folks, or whoever is here in my blog. im off to watch Heroes Season 3 now!

kangjie.
176th episode.

P.S I LOVE YOU

11:59 PM

Monday, September 22, 2008

shitty .

thats how i felt today and a few days ago.

sad,
shitty.

i cant sleep at night.
ALOT of stuffs pass through my mind.
having ALOT of regrets.

felt that i had a fucked up life when im in the bus.
felt that everything is so different anymore.

then i had no feelings.
no feelings about my thoughts.
no feelings about anything.
totally no feelings.

spend around 2hours chatting with her near her house yesterday.
talked ALOT.
think ALOT.
didnt want to leave but i still had to.

did childish act when im on my way home.
got rather pissed.
im just being weird/childish/ridiculous.
so sorry for the one who kena.
im just not being myself.

i seriously think that im a total jerk.
especially after what just happened.

ignorance is bliss.
thats what you told me.

i guess you are right.
i should just be ignorant.
rather than having more regrets adding in to the mountain of regrets i already had.
but what's done cannot be undone.
i can only apologise now.
im sorry.
and i truly am.

im preparing for the worst to happen now.
its just the matter of time for this to happen.
i just hope you can be the one who do it.

i will be working very hard tomorrow,
work can let me forget my sorrows,
let me forget how miserable i am,
let me forget that how stubborn i am,
clinging on to the past and not willing to give up.

everything will be just fine.
having positive thought is what i taught you.
i should be having them too.

thats all for my ranting.
goodnights to all!

kangjie.
175th episode.

P.S I LOVE YOU

11:59 PM

Friday, September 19, 2008

timberland .

BINGO!
like my pictures above,
i need LOVE from people around me!

from YOU,
from FRIENDS,
from FAMILY,
from EVERYONE!

i just think i lack of LOVE!
hahaha.

anyway.
got back my results.
super satisfied with my HR!
she/he didnt disappoint me!
hohoho.
the others are quite expected.

well,
my life is as usual,
not that happening.

resume work at timberland.
and today really suck!
especially my him/she manager.

i told them that im sick.
apparently im not lah.
but thats not the main point.
the main point is that.
he say that i should tell him in ADVANCE that im going to be sick.
WHOA!
if i can predict that,
then i assume im a psychic?
i shouldnt work at timberland then.

SICKENING!
he didnt realise how ridiculous he sound through the phone!
DAMN IT!
oh well.
shall not dwell on it anymore!

okie!
thats all folks.
will update soon, i hope! hahha.
ciao!

feed me guys!
kangjie.
174th episode.

P.S I LOVE YOU

11:52 PM